A Man Taking A Walk Along A Pier...

... suddenly hears this heartbreaking sobbing. He goes to investigate the noise and finds a woman in a wheelchair, without arms or legs, crying her eyes out.

He rushes over and kneels down besides her, asking her if she's ok, has she been abandoned here?

"Well," She answers, through her sobbing "I had a terrible accident that's left me like this, and now nobody wants to be near me anymore. I've never even been properly kissed."

The man thinks this over a few moments before he cups her cheek, lifting her head up a moment and gives her the most tender kiss he's ever given another person. "Now you have..." he tells her.

This makes her smile for a moment, but when he gets up again she starts crying once more, this time even louder. He turns back and asks her what's wrong this time.

"I thank you for the kiss... it was lovely." she explains "But it just makes me realize that I've also never been fucked."

He thinks this through for a few moments again before he leans over, grabbing her firmly around the waist and with one big heave tosses her right over the edge of the pier.

"Now you are."