Two Prized Cows

Farmer O’Leary has two prize cows, Daisy and Buttercup.

One day, he borrows the neighbors’ bull and puts it into the field with the cows.

The bull does not show much interest in the cows – seems to be a swami! – and soon Farmer O’Leary gets bored and goes off for his lunch.

That afternoon, Father Fumble, the village priest, comes to the farmhouse for tea, so Farmer O’Leary calls his farmhand, Sean, and tells him to go out to the field and watch the bull. Sean is to let him know if the bull shows any interest in Daisy and Buttercup.

Mrs. O’Leary is just pouring Father Fumble a second cup of tea, when Sean comes bursting into the room and shouts, ”The bull is screwing Daisy!”

Father Fumble almost chokes, and Farmer O’Leary drags Sean angrily into the kitchen.

”Listen here, you idiot!” snaps O’Leary. ”You can’t use language like that in front of the priest! Next time, say something like, ‘The bull has surprised Daisy.’ Now, get back outside!”

Ten minutes later, Sean comes bursting into the room in a high state of excitement.

”Farmer O’Leary!” he stammers. ”The bull, er... the bull’s, ah....!” But he cannot finish his sentence.

”Do you mean,” says O’Leary, with a knowing look, ”that the bull has surprised Buttercup?”

”I’ll say he has surprised Buttercup!” shouts Sean. ”He is screwing Daisy again!