Mike Is About To Have Dinner At His Girlfriend's Parents' House For The First Time...

and he wants to show up in style, so he decides to buy a motorcycle. After searching ads online he finds one that looks excellent. He gets to the seller's house and looks at the bike. It is in pristine condition! Not a scratch or rust anywhere. He asks the man "This bike must be 10 years old, how do you keep it looking so nice?" The man gives a little smile and pulls out a small container of Vaseline. "It's an old trick. Any time it rains I rub this stuff all over her. Keeps the rain off keeping it fresh and shiny! Hell, if you're buying the bike, I got no use for this so you can have it with the bike." So, off goes Mike on his new ride with his tiny tub of lube. He picks up his girlfriend on the way, and on to the parents place. His plan works out well. When they arrive, her parents come out to greet them and they love his new bike! They get off to a great start, chatting up a storm. Her dad says that supper is ready so they should head inside and eat. They start to head in when his girlfriend holds him back and says "listen, my family is a little weird. There is a rule in there that anyone who talks during supper has to do the dishes." Mike thinks this isn't too weird until he gets inside. There are dishes EVERYWHERE!! All over the house, in the living room: dirty dishes! In the hallway, dirty dishes! Everywhere he looks, there are just piles and piles of dirty dishes! They sit down to the table and begin eating, and Mike starts thinking "Man, these people are dedicated. I could do whatever I want and nobody will say anything, there's no way they would do all these dishes!" So he slides his plate aside and grabs his girlfriend, throws her on the table and just starts plowing her. Her parents look mortified, but not a peep. He finishes up, has a couple more bites of his steak and tries something else. He grabs her mother this time! slams her up on the table and gives it to her hard! The dad looks pissed, his girlfriend looks jealous and the mom looks like she's having a great O, but still, nobody says a damn word! Mike finishes once again and sits back down. Feeling very satisfied he leans back and looks out the window. He sees that it has started raining and immediately jumps up and pulls out the jar of Vaseline. Seeing this the dad yells out "OH, FOR FUCK SAKE!! I'LL DO THE GODDAMN DISHES!!!"