...Track 29, Boy Can You Give Me A Shine...

Some guy named 'Roy' was in a changing room and had just taken off a pair of newly purchased loafers to try on a pair of pants in a store. Suddenly, a seeing-eye-dog burst into the changing room Roy was undressing in, gobbled down Roy's loafers and ran out. Since Roy was pantless and astonished, he couldn't go chasing after the dog. He didn't really feel like shopping anymore, so he put his jeans back on and walked out in his sock feet. He informed mall security and they escorted him to the control booth so he would look at the surveillance cameras to try to spot the guilty canine. The mall security looked and looked at footage while Roy had some coffee someone had offered him out of pity. Well, finally, the security guard thought he saw the culprit on screen in another part of the mall. He motioned to the hapless victim and lamely said,

"Pardon me, Roy, is that the dog that ate your new shoes?"