An Engineer In Hell

One day, an engineer dies. He goes before St Peter and is told that he'll be spending eternity in Hell. So, he goes to Hell, looks around and says to Satan: 'This place sucks'.

The engineer gets to work building a functional fresh water system, air conditions the whole place, builds a sewerage system, a reliable, renewable energy system, he creates a functioning public transport system and regulates wages so that the demons have time off, overtime, and casual Fridays.

Then, one day, God discovers that there's been a mistake and the engineer was supposed to go to Heaven. So God goes to Hell and tells Satan that he's taking the engineer. Satan tells God to fuck off. 'Why would I give this guy back to you? He's awesome. Before you sent him here it was uncomfortable, smelly, dirty and just downright horrible. He's made it great.'

God stares Satan straight in the eye and says: 'If you don't give him back, I'll sue you.'

To which Satan replies: 'And where are you going to get a lawyer?'