Make The Donkey Laugh, Drink For Free.

A man walks into a bar. In the front of the bar there is a small pen with a contented looking donkey munching away at hay. On the pen is a sign which reads "Make the donkey laugh, drink for free all night." So the man tells the bartender he'd like to try make the donkey laugh. "Go for it" says the bartender. The man walks up to the donkey and whispers in his ear. The donkey starts to laugh its ass off, rolling on the floor and gasping for air. The bartender is surprised but a deal is a deal so the man drank for free that night.

The next week, the man returns. The donkey is still there but now the sign reads "Make the donkey cry, drink for free." So he tells the bartender he's going to give it a shot. He goes back to the donkey and the next thing you know, the donkey was crying its little eyes out.

Triumphantly the man returns to the bar to start claiming his prize. The bartender finally says "OK I'll bite. How did you do it? How did you make the donkey laugh one week and cry the next?" "Well, the first time, I told the donkey my dick was bigger than his." "And the next?" Asks the bartender. "I showed him."