A Pioneer Family Is Making Its Way Across The Prairie....

... when they come upon a Native American laying with his ear to the ground.

He gestures off into the distance and says "Wagon train, 3 miles east of here. 12 adults, 8 children, 16 oxen. Carrying a week's worth of supplies and moving at 6 miles-per-hour."

"Wow!" says one of the pioneers, amazed. "You can tell all of that just by listening to the ground?"

"No" replies the man. "Fucking ran over me half an hour ago."