Dirty Stinking Hippies

I would like to consider my self seasoned in the music scene of smelly wooks. I love the music hate the people but what are you gonna do? It makes for funny stories and its a god damn good place to people watch. I compiled a list of Hippie Jokes. Figured you guys would like it. Some I made up (not so good) some I stole. so here steal them off me. If you have any to add that be awesome.

How do you hide money from a hippie? Put it under the soap.

What's dumber than a box of rocks? The hippie carrying it cross country. whats dumber then that...the custiee that bought them

what kind of cigarettes does a hippie smoke? yours.

Why do hippies love didgeridoos so much? Its the closest they will get to sucking a trees dick

Whats the difference between a hippie chick and a washer machine -you can dump a load in both of them but ones gonna follow you around for the weekend asking you to spin it.

What do you call a hippie who just broke up with his girlfriend? -Homeless

How many hippies does it take to change a light bulb? -They don't change it they watch it burn out and follow it around for 30 years like the god damn grateful dead.

How can you tell if the guy on your couch is a hippie? -He's still there

How do you know a hippie chick is on the rag? -Shes missing a sock How do you know shes off? -One sock is tie died red

What do hippie Chicks and The U.S. Government have in common? -They both let bush be in charge for too long.

Why do hippies wave their arms when they dance? -To keep the music out of their eyes

how do you know if a hippies been at your house? -your refrigerators empty, your daughters gone and your dog is pregnant.

How do you get a hippie girl pregnant? -Cum on her shoes and let the flies do the rest

At a drum circle whats the difference between a Hippie chick and a joint? -a hippie chick makes it all the way around the circle

How do you know if a hippie has a girlfriend? -He has two clean fingers

Why couldn't the life guard save the hippie??? -He was too FAR OUT man!!

Why wasn't Jesus Born at a festival? -Because he couldn't find three wise men or a virgin

What does a hippie say when you tell him to get off your couch? -Nameste

How do you know a hippie did too many drugs? -What I didn't say anything